People like you
Cole-hearted self-centered
And violently negligent
Casing your darkness and destruction
Into the warm open hearts
Of people like me

©2017 by Loolwa Khazzoom. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be copied without author’s permission.

On the cusp of your death
I find a sense of peace and relief
That I have crossed the finish line
Done my part
Given everything I have
And that it is out of my hands entirely
In the hands now
Of Gd and your soul
But I am also wracked with
A quiet grief
That is pervasive
And inescapable
Because this world my world
Will never be the same without you
Who will I turn to
In the middle of the night
When I feel tormented
Who will love me so fiercely and unconditionally
As you have
So that I always know
I am held somewhere
By someone
I feel lost already
As you begin the descent
And your heart is there
But not your mind
An odd gift in some way
Gradually one step at a time
Preparing me for
The absence of your presence
Giving time to adjust
To the inevitable gaping hole
While I am still able
To cuddle up next to you
Lay my head on your chest
And feel soothed and aligned
In your heart beat
Embracing encircling holding me
Like you once did
Comforting soothing welcoming me
As I emanated from You
And into this Life

©2019 by Loolwa Khazzoom. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be copied without author’s permission.

It started off
With unkind voices
And convoluted actions
And I subsequently gravitated toward
Unkind voices
And convoluted actions
Like Shabtai Tzvi
Seeking to extract the Sparks of Light
From within the Darkness
Or more accurately in my case
To cast the magic of Light upon the shadows
Illuminate permeate the Darkness
Excavate the broken child
From within
Cradle her him
Like the mother healer teacher peaceful warrior
That I am
But I never got to have
My own childhood
Receive the cradling nurturance assurance
That I needed
That we all need
Especially as children
Regardless of capacities or proclivities
Because the plant simply needs Light
To grow
And this morning I find
That I am tired
That I need something
I have not been receiving
And I wonder why
So I have been asking
What I need to reconstruct inside
Shift the paradigm of my life
So that I may Live
And receive the greatness
That I give
Trusting that if I am out there
Doing
There must be others like me
With this orientation
This depth this willingness
To go the distance
Do whatever it takes
And I am more concerned now
With dancing in the surf
And sitting quietly on the sand
Than seeking out
And giving my Life Force to
Those who need fixing
©2019 by Loolwa Khazzoom. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be copied without author’s permission.