It’s not what I want
But it is what it is
And I’m learning to let go
To know
That I’m worth more effort
And that you’re not
Able or willing to extend yourself
No matter what the convoluted reasons
It’s not my job to explain to you
The wealth of alternate possibilities
Or to enact them on your behalf
So as to avoid the tragedy
And absurdity
of this love dying
When it’s entirely unnecessary
Instead it is my job
To find the man
Who is open and available
And will make me top priority.

©2019 by Loolwa Khazzoom. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be copied without author’s permission.

You see the effect
And attribute a cause
Without knowing the context
Or back story
Unwittingly contributing to the damage
That I keep at bay
Through the conscious behaviors
Which you perceive as
Thoughtless reactions
Feeding into the victim perpetrator storyline
That threatened to destroy me
Throughout my life
You have but pieces of information
Which you have the arrogance
To treat as knowledge
Making you dangerous to me
And yet if I set boundaries
You are likely to respond to my self-protection
As an act of aggression
Feeding further into this exasperating narrative
Adding weight to the magnet
That attempts to suck me
Into this drama
Disrupt the delicate equilibrium
That I have miraculously achieved
Despite the forces of chaos and destruction
Raging around me
As I step into the churning waters
And save her from going under

©2019 by Loolwa Khazzoom. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be copied without author’s permission.

Your actions
Create situations
That you respond to
As a victim

©2019 by Loolwa Khazzoom. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be copied without author’s permission.